Day 27: Forgiveness

Our tendency toward forgiving others or tendency to hold grudges has measurable effects on our body systems including: risk of heart attack, blood pressure, sleep, and pain sensitivity. Forgiveness is also associated with reduced cognitive decline over time, reduced substance dependency, and higher satisfaction with life. Recognizing that being wronged is common place and these effects can be severe, Tyler VanderWeele, PhD (a prolific researcher on the NIH National Library of Medicine) makes a case that forgiveness should be viewed as a “public health issue.” The Church shares this “public health issue.”

That phrasing “public health issue” is an interesting play on words given the impact that forgiveness has on the efficacy of the Church. Resentment has given Satan dangerous footholds which we can't afford. According to Bob Enright, PhD (a psychologist at University of Wisconsin, Madison), true forgiveness is going beyond simply letting go…it's offering something positive (empathy, compassion, understanding) toward the person who hurt you. Do you find it unimaginable to extend that kind of forgiveness to someone specific you have in mind?

Matt 18: 21: Then Peter came to him and said, “Lord, how many times must I forgive my brother who sins against me? … (NET)

Christ answered in a parable where a slave was forgiven an enormous debt he owed to the master of the house. That slave went out and demanded that another pay back a small sum that was owed to him. The master was not pleased when he heard of this.

Matt 18: 32: Then his lord called the first slave and said to him, ‘Evil slave! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me! 33 Should you not have shown mercy to your fellow slave, just as I showed it to you?’ 34 And in anger his lord turned him over to the prison guards to torture him until he repaid all he owed. 35 So also my heavenly Father will do to you, if each of you does not forgive your brother from your heart.” (NET)

Christ was encouraging Peter to look deeply at himself instead of fixating on what his “brother” might do. Peter did not yet realize how much it would cost God to forgive Peter's sin.

At one particular dinner setting a woman was weeping at Christ's feet and she wiped her tears from His feet with her hair. The dinner host, Simon, was appalled that Christ would let her touch Him. Christ spoke in parable of two debtors who were forgiven, one 500 coins, the other 50. “Now which of them will love him more?” He asked. Simon rightly answered “I suppose the one who had the bigger debt canceled.” Christ explained…

Luke 7:47: Therefore I tell you, her sins, which were many, are forgiven, thus she loved much; but the one who is forgiven little loves little.” (NET)

Do you identify more with Peter, Simon (the host), or the woman at Christ's feet? Does your propensity to forgive others confirm this?

In what ways might the division we see in churches be a result of un-willingness to forgive?

Is lack of forgiveness creating barriers between you and others?

Way back in the first quarter of 40 Days, we talked about forgiveness of our sins being a gift from God and not something we earned. Today, we're thinking about consequences of not forgiving others…even if the grudges we hold are “little” ones.

Interdependent